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Dialogue Gap


When the Great Recession of 2008-9 took its toll on my clients, I used the down time to reflect on how things had changed in the world since my first book on negotiation.  I noted a declining ability for people to come to the table to discuss and resolve their differences.  Despite communicating more than at any time in history, people seemed to be losing their ability to dialogue.  This led me to discover the difference between communication (mostly when we send information) and dialogue (mostly when we think together).  Whereas communication focused mostly on speaking and listening, dialogue included these two skills as well as respect, suspending of assumptions and presence.  I coined the term Dialogue Gap to describe the problems arising when our declining ability to dialogue comes at a time when dialogue is needed more than ever before.  The book became an instant success and continues to sell well.

Dialogue Gaps now figure heavily in international trade, politics, environment concerns as well as social and family issues.  This book has three important parts.  Firstly I explain the negative effects of dialogue gap.  Secondly, I describe and give examples of the five categories and specific skills people need to master to become effective dialogue leaders.  Finally I introduce nearly 50 dialogue methods that effective dialogue leaders have available today to bring together stakeholder to dialogue key issues in ways that lead to successful outcomes.  I include links to further information and suggest when to use the various dialogue methods proven to work around the world.


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Negotiation: Mastering Business in Asia

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People often say the best negotiators are in Asia.  This book uncovers what it is these star negotiators do that makes them better than the rest.  You can learn to be a star negotiator by reading and applying the best practices outlined in this book.  The book title suggests it was written for business schools, but this is a very small part of my work.  Despite this, as recently as June 2019 an MBA student from Beijing said my course based on this book was amongst the best courses in her entire MBA programme. 

It is difficult to know one’s own culture.  After a decade spent studying and working with star negotiators throughout Asia and around the world, I selected anecdotes and examples from my experience and added a chapter focusing on how negotiation in Asia is different.  These observations continue to be sound today.  On reading this book, a Korean client noted his countrymen better beware now that foreigners understand Asia better than Asians do. 

This book continues to sell well, and leading company executives continue to seek out my help for their negotiations in and across Asia and beyond.  The book focuses on the attributes of star negotiators and what to do at each stage of your negotiation to achieve the optimal outcomes you are after.  A companion Star Negotiator Case Book (published by Potential Limited) is also available for organisations running our train the trainer workshops. 

In the global village we work in today, many of us have to deal with subsidiaries, partners, suppliers and customers throughout Asia. Yet many of us, me included, know little about Asia apart from a few key differences to the West, for example: “yes” can mean “no”, “face saving” is important, copyright may mean little, plagiarism is rife, and that “facilitation payments” are common in some countries.

Most of us do realise that there are many countries with very different races, religions, cultures, languages and traditions throughout a huge region that stretches from Pakistan in the West around to the Philippines, Korea and Japan in the East. And we know that Asia includes two of the most populous and economically developing nations in the world, India and China, and the largest Muslim nation, Indonesia.

This book is not going to help you manage corporate communication in Asia. But it is recommended if you have business dealings in Asia or advise those who do. While it is a how-to-do-it book on negotiation, there are many pointers as to the way things are as they are in the region. The author has vast experience working, training and communicating in Asian countries. He writes well and explains things clearly and from a Western perspective.
— Rodney Grey

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The Business Developer’s Playbook


Since the start of my consulting career service professionals in big firms around the world all wanted to learn my approach to business development.  Having watched my success they realised I must be doing something right.  What I was doing was learning quickly from others and from my mistakes and then codifying this to remind myself and others what to do to be consistently successful.  The Relationship Selling Principles and the DNA of Dialogue Selling became the basis for my business development training and consulting around the world.  This book describes each of the relationship selling principles as well as the step by step approach of the dialogue selling process. 

This book is written for three specific target groups: 

  1. Service professionals wanting to grow existing client accounts as well as acquire new clients

  2. Change leaders wanting to sell their ideas to make the world a better place be that at work, at home or at large in society

  3. Ambitious people wanting to sell themselves into better positions regardless of whether they are looking for work, promotion, partnership or more.

I read your book and have also referenced it for some of my training content. I find it very useful, practical and most importantly what you said is real, looking it from an Asian, Malaysian, consultant and trainer’s perspective.
— Lily Lauc

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Success Culture (Working Title)

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This book addresses the growing gap between “the best and the rest” and what it takes to be #1 today in either the private or public sector around the world.  I identified nine specific behaviours typical of the best yet slowing down most organisations today.  Those organisations that have tweaked their corporate culture to succeed, are rapidly attracting talent and capital as they conquer their industries and grow their economies.  The nine behaviours include: inspiration, sustainability, trusteeship, openness, partnering, bravery, alert to change, dialogue, and faith.  Each “hurdle” is described in detail and plenty of examples are given for each. 

This book is full of interesting and at times humorous anecdotes and makes sense of my work with leaders from over 600 organisations and 60 countries around the world.  I have yet to release this book to my publisher, but pre-publication copies are available from Potential Limited for leaders and organisations wanting to get ahead of their competitors.